Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Sometimes I wish I was a guy . . .

I recently received an email from Jay entitled "Why Men Are Happier." I read this with interest, since, at least in our household, that statement tends to be pretty much truth. I am posting it here and invite your comments. I find that all the statements are true, and it made me wonder why it's so complicated to be a woman. Sometimes, often in fact, we are our own worst enemy, toughest critic, hardest taskmaster, and worst friend. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like . . .

Men are just happier people. What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress - $5000. Tux rental - $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.You can do all your Christmas shopping on December 24th. No wonder men are happier.


Though this made me laugh out loud, it also made me wonder . . . what was God thinking when he made the sexes so very different that there's no way they will ever completely understand each other?

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