Overhead from my guest bathroom, where Sam was taking care of business:
Sam: Oh MAN!
Me, stepping around the corner in alarm . . .
Sam: Yeah, I think that will be enough. (as he pulled off one more foot or so of toilet paper to add to the bigger than a softball wad already in his hands . . .)
Me: Let me help you with that (laughing hysterically).
(Note: We used the appropriate portion, left the rest of the wad on the counter for the next seven or eight users . . .)
It's just a three ring circus, all the time. I love it.